Happily Abducted?
by Clouds On the Brain
Summary: On a whim, and after ingesting a few potions possibly too many, Link decides to kidnap Zelda early one morning. Since the Hero of Time can't possibly mean any harm, and she really needed a mini-vacation from her royal duties anyway, Zelda goes along with it and the two goof off around Hyrule. Maybe getting kidnapped isn't quite as terrible as she'd thought...


**This plot bunny has been knawing on my arm for months now... so, here it is. Hints of Zelink, though they're only hints, so don't expect too much. ****I've always wanted to explore the idea of Link kidnapping Zelda for whatever reason. Enjoy~!**

Zelda sat in front of her mirror, trying to decide on something very important.

Make-up.

Well, it was important to her, at least. She couldn't decide if she should wear any at all, or put on the usual amount, which was still pretty little. The make-up look was safe, and people liked the way she looked in it, but her natural face wasn't terrible, either—in fact, she was gorgeous with or without the make-up. However, today she wanted to see what people would think of her appearance if she went outside plain, like she had when she was younger. It was a test, and her position as the holder of the Triforce of Wisdom made her curiosity very hard to resist.

It was decided, then. No make-up today. She was about to get up and head downstairs to breakfast when she heard the sound of glass being shattered, and someone came hurdling into the room through her window.

"Link?" she gasped, looking at the intruder, whom she immediately recognized as the green-clad Hero himself, who had saved her and the kingdom time and time again, not even counting his various past lives.

Link gave her a blank stare. "Yeah, Zelda… you're gonna have to… come with me."

Before she could reply, (though she wasn't quite sure how to) he shouted down the stairs, "I'M KIDNAPPING THE PRINCESS!" and picked her up by the waist.

"W-What are you doing? Unhand me this instant!" she demanded, though her protests quickly turned to screams as Link fired his hookshot at the bottom of the neighboring tower and launched them both out the broken window. As they flew, with only a thin metal chain rapidly pulling them through the air and towards the ground, Link was laughing hysterically and Zelda could see the guards panicking below them. They fell two feet after reaching the wall, allowing Link to land safely and literally hit the ground running. Though Zelda struggled, the teenage hero was stronger than her and easily ran with her tossed over his shoulder.

He stopped when they reached Lake Hylia, where he unceremoniously dumped her onto the grassy shore. She stood up and wiped the dirt off of her behind.

"You—! You are—!" she began, though her fury prevented her from accessing her vast mental dictionary of insults. "You will be in so much trouble when the guards get here!"

Link shrugged. "_If _they get here."

"I beg your pardon?"

He rolled his eyes. "Come on, Zellie, you know about the poor state of Hyrule's army. If you're seriously thinking the soldiers are competent enough to even remember which direction I ran in, let alone find us, then I doubt Nayru's choice in giving you her piece of the Triforce for safekeeping."

She was silent. Link had a point, despite the fact that he'd clearly cracked and was beyond all sanity as it seemed. He was smiling lazily up at her from his seat on the ground.

"Why did you abduct me? You're the _hero, _remember? Have you drunken too many potions, or what?" she asked.

He grinned. "Admittedly, I've had a few, but I'm sober enough to realize exactly what I'm doing and why I'm doing it. I just wanted to see what would happen if I kidnapped you. How long do you think it would take for someone to save you, if the kidnapper was me—the only real hero the kingdom has ever been able to depend on? It's an experiment. Surely you could appreciate that."

Zelda sighed. She sat down next to him and said, "It's an interesting experiment, and I admire the fact that you are being so daring just to satisfy your curiosity. Though, you have to realize that there will be consequences once this is over, even for you."

"Yeah, I pretty much figured that." he replied. "You're in charge, though, aren't you? Couldn't you let it slide, since I've saved you so many times?"

"No way. You're getting beheaded the moment the guards arrest you."

He could tell she wasn't serious. "I just got bored, is all." he insisted. "You don't get out much anyway, so you should probably thank me."

Zelda scoffed. "_Thank_ you?"

"You're welcome."

"That's not what I meant!" she hissed. "What do you mean, I don't get out much? I'm the ruler of Hyrule! I travel all over the country!"

Link raised an eyebrow. "Yeah? Then, when you travel, how much time do you get to spend on yourself? Like, doing things that you want to do, and not what your duties obligate you to do?"

When she didn't reply, he laughed. "That's what I thought. You could at least appreciate all the time I've suddenly freed up for you."

"Sitting in the mud by Lake Hylia isn't exactly how I'd want to spend my "free time," if you insist on thinking of it like that."

"Then what _do _you want to do?" Link stood up and called for Epona, who galloped to his side. He reached out a hand to Zelda, who grudgingly took it and let him bring her to her feet.

She smoothed out her skirts. Link was giving her a look, challenging her to get up on the horse with him and shirk off her duties for the day. She knew very well that doing so would be reckless, immature, and quite honestly be making a mockery of her position, though her pride egged her on to take up his challenge. She mounted Epona, sliding behind Link and wrapping her hands around his waist so she wouldn't fall off.

"I've always wanted to jump off of that waterfall in Zora's Domain. You know, the high-dive practice spot? It looks like it would be a lot of fun." she said.

"It's pretty fun. I did it all the time when I was a kid." Link replied.

Zelda nodded. "Whenever we visited, my parents, my attendants, and even Impa never let me try the game there, since it didn't befit someone of my stature. So, could we…?"

Link flicked the reigns, sending them both galloping off towards Hyrule Field.

"Ack, wait!" Zelda cried, so loud and at such a close proximity that it made Link's eardrums ring. He made Epona skid to a halt.

"We'll have to go by Hyrule Castle in order to get to Zora's Domain. Someone might see us! Don't you know another way to get there? A shortcut, maybe?" the princess asked.

Link's face twisted into a grin. "Oh, I know a shortcut, all right. I just hope you don't mind getting soaked a little early."

"Hmm?"

Zelda found herself diving into the water to reach the tunnel that connected Zora's Domain to Lake Hylia. Had her personal tailor been there, he would be furious, and would have yelled at her for getting the dress wet. She didn't care. Link was following right behind her, with the Zora tunic and his iron boots equipped.

They emerged in Zora's Domain, where both were surprised to find the entire area empty. The waterfall was flowing peacefully, as usual.

"I'm going to guess that they're all out looking for you." said Link. "We'll be fine." He made his way up towards the King's throne room, carefully, making sure that there weren't any Zoras still hanging around. He flinched when he heard King Zora the Sixteenth call out to him.

"Link! Thank goodness you've arrived." said the king. "Didn't you hear? Princess Zelda has been kidnapped by an unknown criminal! Hurry, you must go to save her!"

Link kept his back turned, so the Zora king wouldn't be able to see the smile creeping across his face. "Oh, is that so? No one knows who it was that took her?"

"No, the entire kingdom is chaos trying to figure it out! My dear, sweet Princess Ruto… she and the other sages aren't telling anyone anything! It's all so very confusing!"

"Good to know." said Link. "Don't worry; I can assure you that I'll have her back at the castle by nightfall. This unknown fiend will be stopped. You can count on me."

Reassured, the Zora king closed his eyes and took a nap. Link used the opportunity to sneak Zelda by him.

"I think I'm having second thoughts." she said, as they stood at the top of the waterfall. Both of them had left their shoes down below. "M-Maybe this is a bad idea after all. You should just take me home."

Link smirked. "No second thoughts. I kidnapped you, remember? You don't get a choice. Just dive." With this said, he pushed her.

She screamed. Link almost thought King Zora might wake up, but he was relieved to see the portly king was still fast asleep. He dived after Zelda.

"You idiot! Why on Earth would you do that?" she yelled at him, though she was laughing. "That was amazing!"

"Wanna go again?"

"Yes, please!"

About an hour later, both of them were soaked to the bone and shivering. Their clothes were dripping wet. Link pulled on his boots and changed into his regular Kokiri tunic, while Zelda focused on wringing out her dress. It was a futile effort, she soon found out. Not to mention, her high-heeled shoes felt uncomfortable when her feet were so wet and wrinkly. She wished she had a pair of warm leather boots like Link.

Noticing her predicament, Link handed her his Goron tunic. "Here, take it. You'll catch a cold in those clothes."

She took the tunic. She noticed that it wasn't too different from wearing a dress with a belt. The large tunic's looseness on her slim figure hid any evidence of her cleavage, and the matching floppy hat hid her wet hair. Link also had some extra boots to give her, which felt especially nice. She almost looked like a boy, even though it wasn't quite as convincing as when Impa had used her magic to temporarily turn her into Sheik.

"Whoa. You look completely different." said Link. "I would never guess that you're Princess Zelda, at first glance."

Zelda giggled. "So, this is a good disguise, then?"

"Yep. Things just got a whole lot easier."

They left, and once Link got Epona over the bridge they sped off towards Gerudo Valley. There was a guard posted in front of the fortress. She made Link stop before he could go past her.

"Hey, Link. Who's your friend?" asked the guard, eyeing Zelda with suspicion.

"Just an acquaintance." he replied casually. "No one dangerous. We're going to brave the training grounds."

The guard chuckled. "The training grounds, eh? Your "acquaintance" will need a Gerudo token to get in."

"No problem. Nabooru says I can bring guests."

She shrugged, though her face did not lose its distrustful expression. "That's… fine. You may pass."

She stepped to the side, and said to Zelda as they went by her, "You're pretty girly-looking for a guy, aren't ya?"

Zelda blushed. "That's because I'm—!" She stopped herself, and swallowed her words. She tried to make her voice sound deeper. "Whatever. I get that a lot."

They got into the fortress, where both of them paid the ten rupee fee to enter the training grounds. Zelda took one step into the dark, foreboding cavern and felt her adrenaline start to rush.

"Scary, huh? I'll let you hold my hand if your frightened." said Link jokingly.

Zelda adjusted her belt. "I was just about to say the same thing to you. Mind if I borrow your bow and arrows?" He handed the weapons to her. After testing out the fairy bow, she deemed it to be adequate and slung it along with the quiver across her back.

"We'll split up. I'll take this door over here, and you can take the one on the other side. We'll leave the middle one for last, since it just holds the treasure chest maze. We'll meet back here when we've both gotten all of our keys"

"As you wish, Princess. And don't worry; I'll wait for you when I get back."

She crossed her arms. "Are you implying that you'll make it through before me?"

"Well, I _am _the chosen Hero, and the savior of Hyrule. Plus, I've been through this place before. The first run is harder. I have an advantage no matter what way you look at it."

Zelda walked towards her door. "I bet I can beat you, first time or not."

"I accept your challenge."

Link went on his own path, and after collecting all of his keys, raced back to the entrance. He wasn't really worried about Zelda beating him, in fact he didn't even care if she did—all right, that was a lie. He did care. But, there was very little probability that he could be beaten by her.

He went through the door at the exact same time she did. They were both panting and lightly roughed up, and each was in possession of the exact amount of keys their pathways had held.

"It's a tie." they agreed.

_Though, you didn't beat me like you said you would, _Link thought, if only to make himself feel better.

To their disappointment, the big treasure chest at the end of the maze was still empty from the first time Link had opened it, receiving the ice arrows.

"Oh well. It was still fun." Zelda said later, when they were leaving. They had lunch at Lon Lon Ranch, where Malon couldn't help but feel like there was something odd about Link's new guy friend. Something about the way he acted and ate his lunch was vaguely… feminine. She brushed it off.

"Where to next?" asked Link. "The sun is going to set in a few hours, so choose wisely. I said I'd "rescue" you by nightfall, and I do have a reputation to keep up."

"Says the person who broke through my bedroom window and kidnapped me." Zelda took a look at the map. "Castle Town. It's a little risky, but I've always liked playing the games there. I haven't played them since I was a kid."

They reached town just before the sky began to change color. When they walked into the main hub where people tended to gather, Link realized he had a hand hovering over his ocarina. It was a force of habit, even though the redeads had cleared out from Castle Town a long time ago. He closed his pouch.

"Ooh, the bomb-chu bowling alley! I bet I can get a better score than you!" Zelda chirped, prancing over to the colorfully painted building.

"You're on!"

Several explosions and blown rupees later, Link emerged victorious. Zelda dragged him over to the shooting gallery.

"Please, you can't even hope to go against me in something like this." he said.

"We'll see." she muttered. Of course, being naturally adept with the bow and arrow, she won that time. When they left the gallery a half an hour later, only a few people were left on the street. According to one of the soldiers standing guard (who still did not recognize Zelda), the time was six o'clock at night. Both Link and Zelda could feel their stomachs rumbling. There weren't many restaurants in Castle Town to choose from, but after some searching, they came upon a cute little late-night café which would serve them dinner.

Link ordered the fried cuccoo and some soup for both of them. When the food came, he watched Zelda's face as she took her first bite. Her expression went from apprehensive to surprised to invigorated. She attacked the food in front of her and quickly finished most of it.

"Slow down, you're going to choke!" said Link, watching with subtle amusement as Zelda wolfed down her dinner.

She swallowed, and pushed the plate away. "I-I'm sorry, I don't know what came over me. I've never tasted anything so simple, yet so... delicious! And it only took a few minutes to prepare. Is the cook here a wizard? It's strange, because I was sure that I knew the names and faces of every practitioner of magic in the kingdom..."

Link laughed. "No, he's not a wizard, and you really do need to get out more often. Not everyone has a personal fancy-schmancy chef cooking their every meal. This is actually something I could make at home."

"Really? Then, what is this soup made out of? I _have _to tell the cook about it when I get back!"

He chuckled, but it was a nervous laugh. "Yeah, I don't really know what's in the soup. Fish, maybe?"

"What kind of fish?"

"That is what truly befuddles me. I have no idea. It might actually be cow, now that I think about it."

Zelda reached to take out her wallet, when she realized that she'd left it in her room. She glared at Link. "How are we supposed to pay? I didn't get the chance to take my wallet before you snatched me out of my room, you bafoon!"

Link smiled. "Now, what kind of hero would I be if I made the princess pay? Don't worry, I've got enough rupees to pay for both of our meals, plus the tip."

He gave the money to the waitress and they headed outside. It was even later now, probably around seven o'clock at least, and the air temperature had dropped considerably. Zelda shivered.

"Cold?" Link asked.

She nodded. The night air wasn't something she was accustomed to walking around in.

"Let's get you home, where it's warm." he said.

When the soldiers at the castle realized who the strange boy in the red tunic was (only after Link had told them), many of them started the cry, relieved that their princess was safe. They thanked Link for saving Princess Zelda once again, and he casually accepted their gratitude. The six sages were assembled in the foyer, and each of them gave Link a look that whispered, "We know what really happened." However, they smiled at him, thus making a silent promise to keep it a secret.

"Next time, I'm coming with you two." said Saria. "I get bored of being a solemn, all-knowing sage all the time, you know."

Zelda retired to her bedroom, and she promised to return Link's tunic to him in the morning after it had been washed. Before he could take his leave, she tapped him on the shoulder and had him turn to face her.

"Thanks, Link. Today was… fun." she said.

He shrugged. "No problem. I'm just glad that your advisers bought into my story about why you were wearing one of my tunics and why your dress was all wet. If anyone asks, the kidnapper was attempting to drown you, and when I saved you from him, you needed to borrow some dry clothes. So, that's sort of telling the truth, in a way."

Zelda looked flustered. "Link, I… could we do that again some time? Please?"

"Sure." he said, though he was surprised. "I'll leave out the kidnapping part next time, and with less cross-dressing and sneaking around, too. I'm sure your windows would be grateful for that. We could do more stuff that way."

She blushed. "Actually, I liked that part. It felt kind of exhilarating to act like someone else for a change. Surprise me."

"Very well, then. Goodnight."

With a smirk, Link sauntered down the staircase and out the door. He climbed into his house in the Kokiri Forest, where none of the Kokiri bothered to ask anymore why he was always sleeping in "Link's" house. He dozed off.

Zelda flopped onto her own bed, in a rather inelegant manner that would have made her tutors cringe. She smiled.

_I should have Link kidnap me more often._

**The end. **

**Reviews are food for a writer's writing, and I'm sure that you're all nice enough to provide one with a well-balanced mixture of critsism and/or praise. How can I improve? Should I write more fics like this? Etc, etc. Flames will be deleted.**


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